Richman Daydreams

I’ve come to a solution to my problems: a rich husband who adores me.

Now, I’m not one to seriously contemplate marriage. I have no interest, really. It only ends in heartache, I don’t like to share my bed and I am not a fan of having to train someone to put the toilet lid down. I love being single. I like making my own schedule and not answering to anyone. I enjoy the day changing at 2p and not knowing where I’m going to end up. I like being able to plan out my month without having to take into account another person and what he wants to do. However, for the right price I could be convinced marriage is the way to go.

I hate my job. However, I have to be here. I have to pay off debt, save for the future and pay my bills. I have to have health insurance and a retirement plan. This is a very adult job and I do need to sit on my ass everyday and get paid. If I had a rich husband, who adored me, I could quit my job. I wouldn’t need to pay bills because his assistant would do it for me. Wait- MY assistant would do it for me. I could have an assistant. I would be covered under his health care which would include acupuncture and therapeutic massages. I would dip into his retirement fund and he would pay off my credit card debt in one fell swoop. I would have a new car, new clothes and would be able to put all my change into the “Feed the Children” bucket at the grocery store. I could shop at Whole Foods without looking at the total cost and the personal chef we would have would make me six small meals a day so I could watch my weight. I would have a personal trainer and a pool.

Hobbies would become possible. I have an assistant so they could help me organize my large projects and then actually get them done. My scrapbook from Europe (when I went three years ago) would be finished. My ongoing marathon scrapbook (which hasn’t even been started) would get done. I could learn to quilt and then make the squares for my marathon t-shirt quilt I have planned.

The possibilities are endless.

I would get my nails done twice a month and chat with the ladies who work there. I would be able to go to their fundraising events and give money. I would be able to write checks to all the little charities that are out there. Not huge gifts, but something to everyone. I would stop at every lemonade stand and garage sale and buy something, and then donate it to shelters. I would shop at farmers markets and co-ops and support locally.

And the time I would have for auditioning! Holy hell. I would have an hour long voice lesson every week as well as an acting class every other day. I would have new headshots with fabulous clothes. I would meet with agents and PR reps and managers. Hell, I could make my OWN movie and get it out there. I could direct, act, produce….whatever I wanted, because I wouldn’t have to worry about money. I could mount a show in a gorgeous theater. I could remodel an old 1940’s movie house and show old movies once a week. I could have live music performances and invite all my friends to put up their cabaret acts. And there would be lots of karaoke.

I wouldn’t spend more than I needed to feel artistically fulfilled. I’m not buying $10,000 watches or owning seven cars. The house would be a modest size and everything would be eco-friendly and green. Nothing wasted. But I wouldn’t have to work at this job and I would be able to find what fulfills me, without the threat of collection agencies or debt weighing me down. I could find my passion. I could travel around the world and write or take pictures until I felt the draw to do something. I could get in touch with what I wanted and I could make it happen.

The day I release the chains from this desk is the day my life really begins. I enjoy my life, I enjoy the people in my life. But one day soon I am going to be released from this desk prison and I’m going to live the hell out of life.

It would just be faster if I had a rich man who could do that for me now. And he’ll be gorgeous, obviously.